Child First

Children who have experienced their parents’ divorce is clear. Once basic financial needs are met, the greatest social risk to children is prolonged conflict between their parents.

Prolonged parental conflict has both direct and indirect negative effects on children and has been found to be predictive of many serious and on-going problems for children.

The risks to children before, during and after parental separation and divorce and also what helps them to stay resilient to the stresses of change and to thrive.

The results are quite clear in some ways. On-going conflict between their parents is very damaging to children whether their parents are still married and living together or separated and living in 2 households. One child’s description illustrates this well. This boy explained that he felt like half Mom and half Dad, so when Mom and Dad were fighting it felt like the two halves of him were fighting against each other. Fortunately, resolving parental conflict has been shown to support children’s self esteem.

Children are buffered from the stress of the separation by having a strong relationship with Mom, a strong relationship with Dad, and, of course, protection from conflict between them.

We work with parents to support them in their intentions to create the safest and most loving and supportive environment for their children in their 2-household family.

A co-parenting relationship that includes a minimal level of conflict and maximum level of cooperation between parents could be considered the standard that satisfies the best interest of children.

Collaborative Practice has the potential to fulfill children’s best interest following separation and divorce. Interdisciplinary practice groups create a rich pool of resources from which can be drawn the expertise and process options to help the family resolve the legal, emotional and financial problems of the separation.

Interdisciplinary teams of collaborative lawyers, family therapists, child specialists and financial planners can work together in an out of court process to address the unique needs of the family. In addition, the unique combination of advocacy and mediation offered by collaborative lawyers together with the combination of advocacy, mediation and therapeutic process offered by family therapists (divorce coaches) and child specialists creates coordinated forums in which the emotional and relational problems of the couple and of the family can be addressed.

Amicus offers the opportunity to create the highest quality post-separation family environment possible for all family members, especially the children in a child-first approach.